Everything

“In the beginning were words. But not the sort of words you might expect.” – Amir Muhammad , Once Again – Trash, Our Trash Generation: A Collection of Contemporary Malaysian Ideas (1997) I don’t remember a world without language. Always, language and imagination, speculation, utters of sound. Words, beginning of words. What would I be without language? My existence has been determined by language, not only the spoken but the unspoken, the language of speech and the language of motion. My childhood was the oral tradition of Melayu people – which included my immediate family of one elder sister, one younger brother, one youngest sister, my father and mother. My world was the world of several places in memory; Changlun and Yan (Kedah), Lenggong (Perak), Jalan Pekeliling, Sungai Besi and currently it is Taman Tun Dr. Ismail (Kuala Lumpur). The years when I was an offspring (baby to 12-year old), I grew up within a people who didn’t get well with education, including my...

Five funfacts you would waste your time reading. Funfact number 1: I made myself clear that I will NEVER EVER believe in supplements and slimming products and 'their peers' and whatever, though I haven't experienced any. Which suddenly it makes me wonder why I hate it so much without ever having tried it before. Mama's friend came in a timely manner recommending me to have a try on this green tea which she said it's good to remove the bad toxic (is there good toxic in our body?) and to improve blood circulation and other benefits that I deliberately forgot. A snap decision and I've been using it for 2 weeks now and thank Allah I feel strong and powerful and vigorously healthy. Hahaha Funfact number 2: After abandoning Facebook world for ages, I decided to make a comeback and kinda campy that me myself feel annoyed with prolonged updates and status incessantly every few hours. Hahaha But to be fair with myself, they weren't goofy like telling the wor...

Selamat Hari Raya AidilFitri. Maaf Zahir dan Batin. Open house comes in two styles. One is open open. 24 hours a day and all 30 days of the month of Syawal. The other is open on a specific day. Mine belongs to the open open type. Aha! You can always come at any time. It is a great news right? The other type is still in discussion since plenty of stuffs to handle and everyone is playing busy. So, I'll tell you when 'kalau jadi'. Assalamualaikum :)

Assalamualaikum :) I am not an adrenaline junkie but on that date, I gave my best shot, trying one giant thrill ride (only after being forced) and that seven minutes almost took my life. I closed my eyes throughout the duration. Yes, I know quite a waste of time, and definitely money. Aku tahu tu. I couldn't open my eyes, rumbling heart, feeling of curiosity a bit. Poorer, Si Kamu didn't help at all, "Angah buka lah mata! Cantik gila view dia. Jangan lah jadi penakut!" And which I did for less than 3 seconds, without cease, "Ya Allah, selamatkanlah aku!" Heh! Here I am, still alive. :) The first time I went to funfair, hem, I cannot remember when was it. But count them on my fingers, they must be less than five and the obligation not to have a go those bloodcurdling amusements, even though that sluggish big wheel which seemed less hazardous. I don't have enough bravery. Here, after so long without posting any picture, I bring you to see the sigh...

Assalamualaikum :) I can’t comprehend when friends I used to loaf with suddenly pass me up and the smile I give got an awkward reply. I don’t understand why and totally puzzled. And, usually it happens abruptly with different people but those who are connected to each other. So, I suspect there’s must be something. Perhaps the blameworthiness is on my part, spot it or not. But as I am just a human being like you, I suppose you to come and meet me personally, telling me the harm I caused you and the wound I could heal. But, nothing and no one ever has the guts to brazen it out. So, which part should I know how to apologize and make things better? Please tell me that. Or is it any rumor scatters all over the place that the reactions you give you think justified enough on my part? Still, you have no right to do so since I have my own right to be heard. Somehow the old maxim, “Kalau tiada angin masakan pokok bergoyang” is not a positive testimony, you know. That uncertainty of hearsa...

Assalamualaikum :) I’m writing this in library, alone. It is the hour most of friends in class and the view in here is ‘splendid’. Splendid enough to see the contentment of married couple facing me with the cheeky smile from the wife at the same time as the husband keeps teasing her. The newlyweds I think. Semoga bahagia ke anak cucu . :) Well, that’s not the precise story I want to convey. It is about being single-handedly, alone and unaccompanied. Vaguely I wonder why this moment seems so special. I feel truly calm though the library has small construction outside so it produces noise which supposed to get on my nerves. I don’t feel the heat, though. Besides, the vista and such noise help me enjoying my moment, feeling wedged among these people, especially they who sit in crowd for I feel more relief by sitting on my own. I am sure you know what I mean. We all need the compassion of human companionship but somehow we want to escape and be entirely by ourselves, through differen...

Assalamualaikum :) When people sigh about having a boring time at home, Mama sighs too, all the more sorrowfully because she never feels bored at home. Which to be fair with us, she would never let us do things more than what she told us to do. I look at this as it's a full and concise schedule of her: 6.00 a.m - she's already up. 7.00 a.m - watches her favorite Halaqah, Tanyalah Ustaz etc (the only leisure time between her and the telly 8.00 a.m - prepares the breakfast, all the delectable foodies served with compassion and fondness, then later, the other chores get the attention 1.00 p.m - it's lunchy time, obviously she's in the kitchen 3.00 p.m - attends her Al-Quran lesson 5.00 p.m - does her sweepings and dumping at the back, feeds the rabbits and has this 'chat over the fences'. Well, at night we sit all together having our dinner, talk about surroundings. Someone may cause our ears to pus, free lecture on serious stuffs shaking our normal mental state on...

Assalamualaikum :) "I have compiled quite a good collection of things people say about our country. Let me summarize the salient remarks to: 1. Climate - dull but pleasant 2. Internal politics - debatable 3. External politics - true mousedeer wisdom 4. Economy - good 5. Culture - fascinating hotchpotch 6. People - wonderfully warm 7. Men - gentle and stylish 8. Girls - charming but jinak-jinak merpati, much harder to get than they seem 9. Tourist attraction 10. Unspoilt natural beauty plus modern amenities that actually work, bar a few toilets and telephones." - Adibah Amin, As I was Passing, 1970's These kind of matters actually bother a lot in my spare time to stimulate my mind how good perceptions other people had thought about...

Shake, highfive, salam! Assalamualaikum J Q: “I remember this Christmas song that I loved tosing dulu-dulu…..” S: “Twinkle twinkle little…..” K: “Hahahahahahaha!!!!! Shey!!!!! That’s not aChristmas song!” S: “Eh? I really thought that all kids songs used tobe Christmas songs before mat saleh tu semua set them up to be lullabies forkids. Hehehehe!” Q: “Are you serious?” S: “No lah! I know lah twinkle little star tu bukan lagu Christmas. OK, jokes aside, the only Christmas song I still remember yang kita selalu dengar dekat TV, dengan Santa Claus menyanyi sekali. Merry Christmas,Merry Christmas…! Apasal I rasa it really sounds like our lagu Pisang Goreng!!!Kan?” Q, K and S: “Hahahahahahaha!!!!!!” J To the extent that all festivals in Malaysia is Malaysian festival, we the Malaysians share and celebrate all the festivals in Malaysia together, regardless what color weare, what language we speak at home and to whom we’re married with. It is whatever! It belongs to all of us. As for me, it i...

Assalamualaikum :) Well, I can't believe that a little bit of ignorance has made this space abandoned, forlorn and forsaken. And, very little of it has changed in the world of a law student in the past two months. Our mock trial successfully had been performed in front of hundreds people. Through the days, we enjoyed tight happiness working with friends, not to forget those dramas of bullfighting and backbiting (which happened, matured and evolved since centuries ago) and I am not saying that our mock trial was the best mock trial performed by the law students. But, well, we had given the best to bring it on. *clapping sound I just noticed that Raya has left us for like what? Half-month? And I didn't write anything for that long? I am sorry. So people, Salam 'belated' Aidilfitri. For any harsh words that may have hurt you, for any promises that cannot be fulfilled, for any grammatical errors that annoyed you to read and for any reasons that you love to hate, I am asking...

My last post was a month ago. I have my own reasons. Yes. I'll be slowly updating when I'm in a writing mood at the moment then you have to watch this space, aite? :) Happy Fasting to all my Muslim friends.

Today I shall post a 'miserable' excuse for a new entry on blog and get away with it. Yes, it's my blog. Currently reading 'Alexander adalah Zulkarnain'. Throughout 175 pages I've read, Wisnu really determined in proving the great Alexander is Muslim and a descendant of King Philips from Macedonia. The writer reserved the rights of obtaining kudos and write-up for any books reviewer since the grounds are veritable peeled and genuine from Al-Quran, hadith and opinions from great scholars. So I recommend you to buy, read and judge by yourself. Halfway through reading this, I can't say I believe the writer up to the hilt because myself have no chance splitting the sources either they are absolutely true. Maybe, someday? :) Last week has been aright excitement with family. We went to Taman Pertanian Cahaya Seri Alam (I don't really remember the name cause it's freaky long). We called ourselves this sort of adrenaline junkies (though not junkie enough),...

I can clearly see now that I had been badly mistaken in my hope that a week of 'still knowing each other' is just something normal. But sadly say, it's not. I don't say I am in love with him. I mean, not yet. Yes. Like. Sort of. That feeling - as impossible as it seemed. How can I feel so strongly about him in such a short amount of time? I don't have the answer. 'Granted, if I met him earlier, I mean a year before, we probably are seeing each other now. Err! This is insane! How can after a week, I'd be so ready to spend the rest of my life with him? Hah?' Monologue. Yes, I've tried to analyze the situation, to see if I am in the throes of infatuation. He is smart, kind and funny. He is warm to his friends and family, yet no tendency to flirt with just about everyone. Okay? How can you be so sure, Sheriel Aizan? He is open-minded to new things, new ideas, different view-points. While he had his own opinions, he didn't dismiss those of others. Wha...

Assalamualaikum semua :) The true lenses are heart corporates with brain. Both must be innocent. I have wondered why 'White' always adored as pure. Detergent commercials night and day pointing out the new white school uniform as clean, 'Wah, seperti baju baru! Gunalah Daia!' Whatever. For myself, that is not true. How do you know that new plus white equals to clean. Kau tipu tipu tipu aku lagi. You bought it involuntarily realizing that has been used by someone else. Who knows? It might has fallen in the stool. Yark! You just then fessed it up as clean. The resemblance associates with life. Pretty doesn't mean to be kind. White skin is not impossible to lie. Looks can be deceiving. Back to the top, use your 'lenses' to capture all the 'features'. It may be blurry so wipe them!

At the intersection you can hear the clock and people's footsteps, At the intersection, sometimes, a car is smashed up, only to turn up again. The moon on the clock face, the hands keep turning........ I love spiritual stuff, the cluster of beads - healing all the sorrows while glorifying HIM. Somehow I found myself certain that happiness is a snare and a delusion. Let's see. Each birth was celebrated with joy, cakes and ale. So what happen when somebody dies? Yeah, the cries take too age-long to stop. Why don't you save the happiness a bit so that you won't suffer for mourning? Hem?

Disney really pulled my leg during my childhood. Not a single but both. I dreamed to be in a castle with long-princess-likely-dress together fit the floor-length veil on my head. A bouquet of wildflowers hung casually in my hand. Just so you know, this is not lame cause I believe all girls wish the same. Heh! Times treat me to mature parallel with how old my age. If only castle story still takes into my head, I will not study anymore. Because someday, I'll be a fresh attorney with a hectic schedule and no time for looking for a prince-charming! WOOT!