Angka 23 Kadang-kadang Menghina Kita

Assalamualaikum :)

So I have promised to update, unfortunately I've been pretty messed up, there were a lot of stuffs to care yet today I managed to get some space and time to write something here. :)


"Your mom and me decided to start looking for any girl that suits you well so that you'll be getting married by end of this year." Tuan Haji spoke as he stroked his beard gently.

"Are you serious? That's like a month from now!" Ahmad gaped for seconds and sat down pathetically.

"And I'll show you how to date a girl."

"Papa, I know how to date. I just couldn't find the perfect one."

The above situation might sound so familiar to your ears but I find it something bizarre to my hearing. Well, frequently the question of 'Bila lagi...?' been asked to our gender not to our opponents. *grin

To our culture, 23 used to be a monstrous age for a girl to be still unmarried. It worse, when you are not only unmarried but unengaged and the worst, unattached! Everyone then wonder what on earth you could be waiting for. Somehow, I long to be at their position and give those people 'as good as one gets'. It's not that the girls don't want to get married but probably they aim higher and they want to achieve something rather than sitting on bed, head directed to the window, feeling the wind caress the hair and finally surfing the fantasy world. Not everyone of us loves to do that. Please take note.

I hate those clamorous mouths who love to put on the labels, 'Andartu', 'Andalusia' etc. Seriously Aunties, if you find yourselves get entertained by insulting people, put a cardboard on your chest and please kindly tell everyone 'I have ruined one girl's life'. Frankly, I am not being super drama queen what not but those kinds of scams resemble the conditions of unwanted, undesirable that not even one guy in this world ever approached her. *sigh

However, things have changed. Urban life treats you differently. In this century, unwed, unattached and unengaged at 23 not be an issue anymore. I met this kakak three months ago when I did my Law Attachment Program. We sat next to each other in train's couch and suddenly we both talked about so many things.

'Dating is not working anymore. You see, I am 27 and still single. Not even think about having a husband. Lelaki these days eh dik, very lazy. Islam ada cakap cari sekufu kan? I look the sekufu thing not that he makes more money than I do or like he owns bigger house, more expensive car. It's not like that. Cara permikiran kita juga kena lah sekufu. I don't understand those ideologies that a good wife is the one who stays at home, not working and nurturing the kids. Seriously, if he would give me the exact amount I got every month, then I'll marry him. Ini tak. Cakap dengan kita jangan kerja, pastu kita duduk rumah main dengan anak-anak sampai kita comot, then dia cari lain-lain. And the best part is, madu kita office-mate dia! It's terrible but I've got used to living like this, earning my keep and being free.'

That's her choice but I believe there must be something happened that traumatize her for a marriage. But at certain points, I do agree with her. So it's not really easy when it comes to this subject.

So Ahmad, how it feels to be unwed, unattached and unengaged at 29? It must be good I think. Good luck with the becoming arranged marriage then! :D


cikpia said...

i'm 29 - unwed. unengaged. and i'm ok with it.

Sheriel Aizan said...

Hye pia, thanks for commenting :)

you've proven those people that 'jodoh datang bila masanya betul sesuai' bukan 'bila umur sudah matang, kena kahwin!' :D

bittaufiq wannajah with your life :)